Aside

Joke Archive: teacher report

Time for a break! Here’s a joke I pulled from one of those chain emails.

Remarks that teachers would sometimes like to write about their students:

1. Since my last report, your child has reached rock bottom and has started to dig further.

"Digging (image: independentaustralia.net)" joke retirednoway

Digging (image: independentaustralia.net)

2. I would not allow this student to breed.

"Breeding (image: revdwesleyfairhurst.blogspot.com)" joke retirednoway

Breeding (image: revdwesleyfairhurst.blogspot.com)

3. This student has delusions of adequacy.

"Delusions (image: fredstates.com)" joke retirednoway

Delusions (image: fredstates.com)

4. This student sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.

"Standards (image: headmastercgs.wordpress.com)" joke retirednoway

Standards (image: headmastercgs.wordpress.com)

5. This student has been inhaling too much glue.

"Inhaling glue (image: decentcommunity.com)" joke retirednoway

Inhaling glue (image: decentcommunity.com)

6. When this kid’s IQ reaches 50, he should sell.

"Trading (image: lubbockonline.com)" joke retirednoway

Trading (image: lubbockonline.com)

7. The gates are down, lights are flashing, but the train isn’t coming.

"Railroad crossing (image: blog.photoenforced.com)" joke retirednoway

Railroad crossing (image: blog.photoenforced.com)

8. If this student were any dumber, she’d have to be watered twice
a week.

"Watering (image: zoositting.com)" joke retirednoway

Watering (image: zoositting.com)

9. It’s hard to believe that the sperm that created this kid beat out
a million others.

"Sperm (image: mercurymasterpunk.ca)" retirednoway joke

Sperm (image: mercurymasterpunk.ca)

10. The wheel is turning but the hamster’s dead.

"Hamster Wheel (image: unusual pets.org)" retirednoway

Hamster Wheel (image: unusual pets.org)

11. This student has a “six-pack” but lacks the plastic ring to hold it all together.

"Six-pack plastic ring" joke retirednoway

Six-pack plastic ring (image: gma.org)

12. This kid is depriving a village somewhere of its idiot.

"Idiot (image: patenthawk.com)" joke retirednoway

Idiot (image: patenthawk.com)

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3 responses to “Joke Archive: teacher report

  1. My teacher just didn’t understand me. Barry

    Like

  2. Pingback: Joke teacher | Zombieattackmo

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